Blizzards, Lights, and Beef Stew

What a strange week it has been... Starting with the fact that Sara Rudner wasn't there all week because she had a show in the city.  I got A LOT of feedback about my dance and ended up changing and shifting the whole thing. Ross got his gift on wednesday and loved it (thank god!). His phone was being weird all week though and I never heard from him on monday or tuesday really until late that night. 

Tuesday night I also found out about a very close friend and mentor is not doing well physically and it's serious. That was a huge hit to my heart and all day wednesday I was filled with a sadness and heavy heart for her. But I danced in honor of her, she is a huge supporter in my life and encouraged me to follow my passion and apply for Sarah Lawrence. When I found out I had gotten in she was one of the first people I told when I kept it on the low down from most of even my closest friends. 

So to my favorite badass... I will dance in honor of you with my whole heart and spirit!

Friday I had tickets to Fall for Dance program 1 at City Center in NYC. I saw Mark Morris, Lil Buck, Trisha Brown, and The Joffrey Ballet for the first time ever. Let's just say I want to dance for Trisha Brown SOOOOO bad. Her piece was so beautiful and made me extremely sad to see it end. 

Saturday was really the most crazy day of all my days here so far...

At 11:30 I hopped on the train to the city with Bailey to go to the Performing arts library at lincoln center. As I started walking it began to snow... like REALLY SNOW. At noon we got to the city and began to trudge through a few inches of slush and snow. 

Lincoln center was awesome and I found the amazing book by a man in Boise all about Basque Dancing. After working at the library for 5 hours we headed to a pub on 46th and 11th to meet Dawn and Caroline for food and a drink before Sara's show. It was so nice to talk with Bailey, Dawn and Caroline outside of the SLC world. I was able to talk to them on a more personal level which I desperately needed. 

Next was the Show at the Baryshnikov Arts Center. It was AMAZING! An hour long work in complete silence (except a few soft chats and songs by the dancers) based entirely on the lighting. There were so many surprises and funny and thoughtful moments. I was so happy the entire time and at the end I was desperately wanting more. 

After the show I had 2 plans: 1)If the trains were running one of the undergrads was going to give me a ride home from the station. 2) if the trains weren't running or I couldn't get a ride I was going to go with Bailey to her friend's house in Brooklyn til sunday morning. 

luckily the trains were running and Patrick could fit me in his car. 

Sunday Morning I awoke to this:

 Read more for Spiced Pear Muffin and Beef Stew Recipes

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Who doesn't love a surprise of all your favorite baked goods?

I'm hoping Ross loves it... because that was the main portion of my anniversary gift to him (makes sense, since it was cooking that started this whole thing)

Saturday morning for 3 hours my hands worked non-stop to bake 3 of his favorites, all of which I have never made before and was slightly nervous (especially the toffee since that is easily ruined)

However! it all came out well and I really hope he likes it because I enjoyed making all of it

So... first I made everything but the kitchen sink cookies (these were literally bookmarked in my recipe section as "Ross Cookies."

companion cubes make the best assistant bakers

my new companion courtesy of Ross...

and my halloween decoration...

and my new coffee maker...

I spent 3 hours yesterday morning working on Ross's anniversary package and once he receives it I will post the details on here... be excited because I tried new and scary things (keep you mind out of the gutter!)

This week's baking project!!!!

Feta, Red Pepper and Onion Scones (Lauren’s adaptation)

▪                2 cups all-purpose flour (I like using whole wheat flour)

▪                1 tbs baking powder

▪                ½  tsp salt

▪                2 tbs granulated sugar

▪                8 tbs unsalted butter, chilled (in freezer for like 5-10 mins before adding to mixture)

▪                4 tbs Grade B Maple Syrup (if you leave this out, add 1 more tbs of sugar)

▪                3/4 cup heavy cream, chilled or 2%milk for less fatty version (Usually 1 cup milk)

▪                2 red peppers and 1 small onion chopped and sauteed and cooled

▪           4 ounces of crumbled feta cheese

A weekend in Pleasantville...

My weekend in SLO was EXACTLY what I needed. Even though there was some stress and drama just to get there.  I was an hour and a half delayed getting out of La Guardia, however I was being told by the flight attendants that we should make it and they are going to hold the flight in Denver for us. 

Once I get to Denver I RACE to the gate for Santa Barbara and luckily they were still boarding. I get in my seat call everyone and let them know I made it and buckled up. Then the pilot walked out... it was too foggy in SB to land and now LA was too fogged in as well. No flight was landing on the west coast that night... so I get my stuff and walk to the customer service line. 

They rebooked the flight for the next morning at 8 am and gave us hotel vouchers. I go to the embassy suits and realize I haven't eaten that day except some cereal, yogurt and a carrot muffin that morning and I'm STARVING. I call room service... and they are closed for the night. Luckily the hotel had a small "market" with a lot of candy and a couple types of crappy chicken soup. so I bought some soup and popcorn and went back to my room. The good part of it was that it allowed Ross and I to really talk for the first time in a long time completely unrestrained by time or anything. I loved being able to really talk for an hour or so about everything and nothing. 

The next morning I woke up at 5am MT (4am PT 7am ET) and got some food and coffee then collected my stuff and went downstairs to catch the shuttle to the airport. 

I wish I could explain how excited I was... pretty sure everyone on the flight thought I was crazy since I couldn't stop smiling like a fool. 

When I landed in SB Ross and I took the pass back to SLO and stopped at the AG In&Out for burgers and fries. Once we got back to his house it was around noon so we finished eating and took a nap since we were both up late and got up early. 

That afternoon was BEAUTIFUL and warm and sunny and the perfect SLO. we walked to Granada Bistro and had "the Lauren plate" which is goat cheese, nutella, salt, and fruit on crostini bread. Ross had his Spaten optimator beer and I enjoyed Chimay. It was the perfect afternoon

That night I got to catch up with Jude for 20 mins before she and Caren went to go see Axis Dance perform at the Cal Poly PAC. Then the boys and I went to Giuseppe's. 

I really do miss being one of the boys... A meal with Ross, Kiel and Wes will always equal extreme laughing and inappropriate jokes. After dinner we headed to McCarthy's so I could see Vanessa who was working that night and Caren could join us for a drink. It was awesome to catch up with her and hear what's up in her life right now. We were going to go to sheep but we all decided to call it a night instead. 

Sunday morning the 3 boys and I went for brunch before going to Bravo SLO to see Variable Perform. I ordered the stuffed French toast with strawberries... and proceeded to eat the whole thing... then finish Kiel's pumpkin pancakes. 

The leaves begin to change and I'm thinking about my eyeballs

This week has been such a change from last week, it's almost hard to believe. I had an amazing meeting with the program director, Sara Rudner, monday. I talked to her about my stuckness in my choreography and she helped me think through ideas and now I have so many ideas they are bursting to be worked on. I also talked to her about my tendency to over think things and panic. She gave me tips on how to not censor myself and to take the time I need when I start to panic. She also talked to me about my dancing and that I'm doing really well and that I could be even better if I start incorporating more of focus into my work. So this has been the week of the eyeball.

Tuesday I have a graduate seminar based on exploration and experimentation in movement with a anatomical support. So I spent 2 hours initiating movement with my eyeballs and making sure I was really using them and seeing things around me as I dance. It was insanely hard and made me slightly nauseous, but so worth it. The next day in my contemporary class while we furthered the combinations from monday I started to add in the concept of focus to my work. It was amazing how different everything felt with such a slight change of thinking about head placement and what I'm looking at.

From this work I FINALLY got some feedback and comments from my teacher. I've been so worked up over the fact I never seem to get much attention or comments (negative or positive). It was like it lifted a burden from my shoulders and I felt like in 1 class my dancing changed for the better more than it has in a long while. I think it's one of those things where I work as hard as I physically, mentally and emotionally can in order be my best; and when your best incites nothing from those around you it feels as though you've worked for nothing. Which is the wrong way to think, but I am a performer and I am practicing how to perform.


On a completely different note, I leave for California TOMORROW! (Exactly 24 hrs from when I'm typing this sentence) I am soooooooo excited I wish I could explain it. I can't wait to see Ross and tell him about my dance and get his input on my ideas. I can't wait for dinner and Dexter with Caren and Kiel. I can't wait to go to Linnaea's and work on my research paper. I can't wait for sunshine and warmth and love and good food and just to be HOME.

When I got home from school today I immediately started packing and put in my California playlist:

Baking Project Part 5: Carrot Muffins

This weeks Baking project is savory because I realized I really don't want something sweet during my break. I want something hearty and substantial. So I saw a recipe for carrot muffins, a less sweet version of a carrot cake. I have adapted this recipe only a little, I used 100% whole wheat flour in stead of half wheat half white. I also switched vegetable oil out for olive oil. Next time I would like to add a little bit of nutmeg to the recipe as well

I also had an epiphany that is probably my most genius idea of the week by far... yesterday at the store there was a manager's special on a loaf of plain goat cheese (my favorite!). 

So I HIGHLY recommend putting plain goat cheese on the muffin instead of butter or cream cheese and let it melt a little and arm and I promise it will be the best breakfast of your life.

 continue reading for recipe and photos

Tis the season... for apples and cinnamon

Weekend Meditations

I love this tea pot and it's brightness. Teapots have slowly become my beacon of homeliness. I find that it means "there will always be tea or coffee at hand and the whistle will make sure to break through any fog." Teapots make me happy (I may start keeping a list).

Secondly I realized yesterday that this dance blog has slowly become a food blog so my question is... Should I simply start a food blog? Or continue on with the confusion of food and dance together? Comments and opinions are very welcome...

and now time for the french apple cake, that I changed a lot so really it's a Cinnamon apple cake


click read more for recipe and photos....

The hand that burns probably holds the knife

I've created this challenge to myself completely unconsciously for some reason that I want to cook something new and different every week. I guess it is a way to keep myself busy. Food is very comforting and challenging; it has played a large part of my life. I figure if I fail as a dancer or choreographer I'll open a bakery or cafe. Sometimes I wonder if food was my true calling, I watched Julia Child as a kid in stead of Barney. I used to pretend cook and I've always loved the feel of flour in my hands. who knows maybe I'll be so successful as an artist I'll have the income to open a cafe with out a problem. 

I think another part of this food obsession is  a need to fill in the place of my local cafes in SLO, I'm sort of making my home my own cafe (minus the fancy coffee). 

My parents said something that really resonated to me this morning, find something that makes you happy. I'm obviously not happy in my personal life (very happy in my school life). Coming home is hard and the weekends are especially hard and lonely. I have no one to talk to and tell my ideas for my dance. Or how I'm worried that my contemporary teacher doesn't really give me corrections or comments on my work. I want to be noticed and corrected so I can improve and I feel like sometimes I'm invisible. I'd like to tell someone I'm scared I'm screwing up Dawn's dance because I over think EVERYTHING and then panic. Maybe I need to make a calming soup next time instead of a hot and sour one...

CLICK READ MORE FOR THE RECIPE AND PHOTOS

One by one the seasons change and peanut butter begins

I woke up yesterday morning to Fall. It seems like Mother Nature woke up Saturday morning and realized it was October and needed to cool things off a bit. Walking to the grocery store and back home brought back so many memories of France. In many ways I am living a parallel life to my time in France. However I don't have the luxury of having Laine here as a piece of home to hang out with and comfort each other. 

This week went by SO fast! I can't believe it. I'm excited for the next 2 weeks to pass as quickly so I can be home for a few days soaking up the SLO life. Until then I must really dig in and get a lot of work done. 

Yesterday while looking at kittens up for adoption at the local shelter I happened to look up the band The Acorn to see if they've done anything lately. It seems they have put out a new album and allowed me to fall in love all over again!

Images from the week...

Monday I woke up to fire trucks on my street

I made peanut butter chocolate chip cookies

Click on Read More to see my recipe for Peanut Butter muffins with jam centers for an easy to go version of a PB&J.