Therefore a quick update is in order:
We had our winter concert and it went well
I fell in love with this song...
I completed my first semester of Grad school only slightly worse for the wear... but done!
Went to the Sheepherder's ball in Boise, and felt extremely out of place. Most of my friends weren't there or occupied by their new husbands children etc.
I was constantly and pleasantly kidnapped by my brother and Debra.
christmas was a smash (my dinner rolls were awesome)
I made it to SLO after a flight cancellation (that's 2 in a row to slo) and detour through LA.
Ross gave me the most beautiful red kitchen aid mixer.
We took a trip to Pollock Pines to see his parents and San Francisco both were awesome and much needed.
I made him homemade pretzels and focaccia pizza for ross among a lot of cookies and other things
I had the most amazing time in SLO as always and it's always so hard to leave... I hate leaving really
Now I'm back in New York, back in classes, and back to the stress, self doubt, and loneliness I's shrouded in. However I have a plan: I want to draw more and find some sort of inspiration to make a dance I actually like and want to make.
Right now everything I do I feel pushed to do even if I don't like it or want to do it. I can already tell this is going to be a struggle and I need to find some peace and inspiration. Hopefully drawing is the key. I've been trying to do it every day. Hopefully I'll finally find some happiness in Yonkers, because it's just getting harder and harder to live here.
Lastly I had to say goodbye to my childhood dog this week, she was unfortunately very old and sick. But she was the best dog in the world and I know she's in a better place.
At least I have my trip to SLO in march where I will be there for Ross's birthday and then my parents will come down for a few days to visit as well. I can't wait to see the ocean and be in the place I love again with people I love.
